King of Cocktails

Those of you who've been out with me once will know that cocktails are my kryptonite. I'm unable to resist getting one at even the most inoportune of times, like that one time in the middle of a lesbian bar, where all these large women are drinking pints, I stood at the bar, perused the menu for a bit, then ordered some sex on the beach. Things didn't quite kick off like I thought they would, but I'm still glad I've got my kneecaps.

My main problem is that I never remember which cocktails I've had or whats in them (I pick them at random or just choose the ones with the most alcohol in them). As such, getting a cocktail bar in the new flat may be a bit of a larger effort than first thought. Maybe I need to buy a book, or just steal cocktail menus from bars. That's an idea, if you are coming to the house warming, see if you can steal me a cocktail menu, old buddy old pal. Not that I'd condone stealing of course, but you know you want to.

Oh man, now I need a drink.