My bad dancing and toilet talk

Went out last night and had a really good time. I even got to the point where I was drunk enough to dance, which is rare nowadays. I could have been much drunker, but hey, at least I wasn't dancing by myself for once, which was nice....man I'm such a bad dancer it's unbelievable. It's like someones encased my feet in concrete and held my parents hostage incase I think about moving one foot off the floor. But this, like all things will change, or my names not J R Hartley.

Okay, I haven't chased around town looking for a book on fly fishing written by myself but I will try and work on it. It does seem easier with someone else though. Does that make me sound desperate? It wasn't meant to, so you might want to forget about that one.

My bad dancing aside, things got a little weird. When we left the main group, we went to a gay bar (not my choice before you get any ideas. I'm all about the ladies). Anyway, there's two things that I want to bring up here.

The first thing was the toilets. I don't know if it was cramped on purpose, maybe to get people in the mood, but it was far too close for me. I couldn't piss until the room was almost empty, and the fact that I was hanging around in the gay bar toilets longer than I wanted too made it take that much longer. You just can't win sometimes. By the by, I was expecting the deco to be a bit fancier really, you know how guys toilets are always stinking of shit and the ladies is rumoured to be smelling of roses or something. Sometimes life surprises you.

The second thing happened when we got into the bar itself. Now I've been into these places before (again, not by choice) and I think it's easier if you've got some women with you too. Unfortunately this time it was all guys. So, this guy comes up to me and starts chatting away (at this point I feel myself cringing away a little, fearing where the conversation may go). It turns out that he was friends with one of the guys we went to the bar with, he is also one of the many people who believe Mumbles is the boyfriend of a certain guy we all know in the office. Mumbles would like me to let you all know that there is nothing between them and that the rumours are totally unfounded, totally. After I laughed my tits off (on the inside of course, I didn't want to be rude and contradict the guy, that just wouldn't be as funny now would it) we got to talking about our repective jobs. Suddenly he pointed and told me "By the way, that guy with the bald head has a massive cock!". Of course I nodded politely and got out of that conversation as quickly as possible. Nice of him to let me know though. That sort of thing never happens in straight bars.